fearedheir | IC Inbox for Amani

[No message for a few minutes as Squall thinks on if he should answer this or ignore it and hope Rufus never brings it up to him.]

He's my boyfriend.

I see. I'm assuming he's told you about me, then?

Yeah.

Look I don't like what I heard but you also haven't done anything to me yet that goes with any of that so I want to give you the benefit of the doubt so....

I guess let me here your side of the story.

...and again sorry for that image.

Oh I'm not offended by the image.

But to tell my side of the story: chances are Cloud and whoever else you've run into told you Shinra was responsible for the SOLDIER program and was killing the Planet by way of our mako reactors and that Midgar was a terrible hellhole unless you lived plateside.

That's all true. I was only president for a few months before Meteorfall came and destroyed all of that, but it was still my company and it was my family who had done all of that. In the aftermath I've tried to start with reparations, but it's a little difficult when no one is going to trust you.

I doubt anyone else will know about that last part, by the way. Cloud certainly doesn't, he last remembers the rooftop two years ago.

So you weren't the one who sanctioned all those cruel gene splicing and experiments on any of the Soldiers then, right? Did you know about what they did to them though?

Sorry I'm not trying to accuse you I just want to try and get all the details. As for reparations...I would actually like to help. Not for you or anything just help in general. Cloud and all the other firsts have been incredibly kind and welcoming to me and repairs are something I actually have a skill in.

When my world was restored I spent years rebuilding the entire city from damage from monsters and flooding. I'm not a master craftsman and learned everything on the spot but I'd like to help if I can. I've not heard of meteorfall until now but if you need like a city planner or something...perhaps we can talk so when you do go back you have a plan that can work?

[There is a long pause in texts, he doesn't reply back for at least twenty minutes before there is a knock at Rufus' door. Squall is dressed in some baggy clothes and has two mugs in his hand full of coffee if Rufus opens the door.]

I was aware yes, but only after I graduated and became vice president. That program started before I was born, or shortly thereafter.

[That's the last full text message he sends to Squall, as he has to take time to think about how to respond to the rest. It means there's no other unreads when there's a knock at the door.

Rufus gets it, blinking in surprise when it's Squall.]

Hello.

[Squall instantly shoves the mug in Rufus hand before just letting himself in and walking over to the provided table and chair and sits down.]

This is too important for text. Figure we might as well have coffee. You take me as a creme and sugar guy so I put that in yours. Mine is black if you rather switch.

[He leans back a little. Someone, finally, is telling him everything and not bits and pieces and hes not going to throw that chance away.]

So you knew but didn't try to stop anything?

Honestly, I'm a brandy sort of guy.

[Rufus please. But he'll take it and gesture for Squall to take a seat.]

There wasn't anything I could with regards to the SOLDIER program. My title was largely for show. [A sip.] And then I was in Junon on house arrest.

You can get Brandy at Seventh Heaven tomorrow. I don't drink myself.

[house arrest huh? Well that would stop anyone.]

So you really didn't get along with your dad I guess....hm... What were you planning to do if he wasn't there?

I tried to kill him.

[Just saying. He shrugs.]

Fire Hojo, the scientist behind the JENOVA project, for one. I never liked him and he was frankly an extremely fucked up individual. The idea behind super soldiers was intriguing, if not my thing, it was just allowing Hojo to do whatever he wanted was a sure way to get us all killed and what do you know, I was right.

[Honestly.]

Otherwise, I don't know. I don't think about "what ifs", once they can't happen. I try to focus on "what will be" and "what is".

Oh. I see.

[He takes a sip of his coffee as he processes all of this. Its not...right but its not wrong either. Hes not sure what he might have done in Rufus'shoes except not kidnapping Aerith or attacking cloud for sure. ]

I can't fault you for that mindset. I guess then what is your 'what is'? What's your gameplan back home...or here for that matter?

Here? Enjoy the hedonism like I haven't since I was in school. Back home? Likely live out my life as private citizen who just donates to charities and whatever else anonymously. The company is gone but I'm still the richest man on the Planet.

[He'll just also likely have people in the various charities and organizations and governments so he can stay on top of things and poke things to go certain ways. He's just not going to say that.]

So you want to just fuck everything. I guess that's why you followed me home?

[And here he thoight it was the company and offer of food.]

Well regardless, that doesn't excuse the fact you fought Cloud and I'm gonna assume others and tried to take aerith. What was the reason for those things? I can't see anything peaceful about it.

No, you were trying to help and I'm not stupid enough to not take help when I need it.

[Also you seem harmless.]

It was just Cloud, he sent the others away. Aerith was considered a vital part of the Neo Midgar plan of my father's as well as a fugitive, and just letting her and the terrorists who attacked the Shinra Building and "killed my father" would have looked bad.

[Yes, there were air quotes there. A beat.]

I'm not a good person, Squall. Was it wrong to do all of that? Yes. Did it matter at the time? Not particularly.

[hes given so many people the benefit of the doubt, seen how sometimes things arent an easy and yet Rufus just blatantly says hes not a good person. It gets Squall frowning and crossing his arms over his chest.]

So you needed good PR backing you instead of telling the truth. Would anyone have even know about Aerith if you let her go?

[He sighs and puts his head in his hands]

Rufus I'm trying to see if you aren't what you say. One of the people I love tortured me once and not cause he wanted to. Do you regret it? Honestly, even a little?

[It was the principle of the thing, but that doesn't matter.

He thinks for a moment, taking a drink of the coffee.]

I don't know if I can answer that, except to say that it was my company and my family who are responsible for the state the world's in now and I have to take responsibility for that.

[He doesn't have regrets. He's Rufus Shinra.]

[Thats a little disappointing. Hes not expecting Rufus to atone for everything as it wasnt all his fault but even a fraction of regret or sorrow over what he did might have showed an ounce of humility.]

I see.

[He's standing now, cup in hand.]

I know everything isn't your fault specifically...but you might want to learn how to apologize to others if you want to last here. I won't protect someone without remorse for their actions.

[He heads to the door but stops.]

If you still need help I'm across the hall but know I'm only helping because it's what I do and I don't like to see people struggle. Maybe something you should try yourself sometime. Though I think having to live without comforts might be a good thing for you.

You wouldn't be the first person to say that, or think that.

[He stands, finishing his coffee and handing the cup back to Squall.]

Honestly, after hearing you were dating Cloud I didn't expect even this much. I appreciate that you wanted to hear my side. I'm just sorry it wasn't want you wanted to hear.

[Not surprised, though.]

If you want to try and socialize Lucky with D, you're more than welcome to.

Keep the cup. You don't have much here yet. You can give it back after you're the top of the stamp leaderboard.

[He doesnt like leaving things like this, he doesnt like having a sort of in the air animosity with anyone.]

Look Rufus, I know you hardly know me so I don't expect you to open up to me, this is more than I expected too. But as Cloud's boyfriend and a friend of Aerith's I do think you should make ammends to them at least. The rest isn't your fault so I won't hold you to it but...if you want to enjoy your time here and have even one ally at your back...I recommend it.

[He grabs the door and opens it.]

There are monsters in this world, it would be smart to find a strong ally you can trust.

[He blows a bit of flames out of his lips, something Genesis totally taught him how to do before closing the door behind him.]

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